What inspires you? It's probably not some one thing. At least for me, it's quite fluid. Sometimes, I am inspired by things around me. Other times, by the need for release of emotions. And lastly, by unhappiness. I truly believe, or at least I always preach, that if you aren't happy with your life, you have to change it. But I can't help but feel, for the better part of my life, that I am my own worst enemy to happiness. I can't help but feeling, as I look around, that I am better than my life. I don't mean my relationships, or my family. I mean my personal success. I mean that I am not living upto my potential. I've wanted to write for as long as I can remember. I've always written, except in times of....we'll say recreational interferement. (i.e. my early 20s)
I think about my job, as a bartender. I love what I do; but I feel sometimes that when people are there that they definitely see just that part of me. I feel looked down upon. I have a great time at work. I make over $30 an hour to get people drunk, feed them, talk to them and generally have a good time. But, something always nags at me.
"Something is not right with me...." (Cold War Kids)
There is more underneath, and I feel like if I don't pursue what I truly feel; that I will be miserable. I will make everyone around me miserable with my own self-dissatisfaction. So what stops me?
Why don't I write? Why don't I try to be published?
I think it comes down to a very basic fear of failure and inferiority complex.
But, damnit. I'm almost thirty. Get over it already! Perhaps, if I keep telling myself that, it will sink in. I am always torn between embracing my inner and true weirdness and on the flip side worrying about what other people think. Usually, the latter wins. That, so far, has left me truly unhappy.
I don't live a bad life, in fact, there's really not much that most people would be unhappy about.
But. I. Am. Unhappy. So, that must mean that I am not most people.
And it's never too late to be me. In fact, I'd better try before I find myself counting wrinkles and pills and wondering when it became too late.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
20July2010 ~ Pt2
Feeling odd today. So this morning I was totally not looking forward to my first day back at work. When I arrived, it took me a few minutes to get my bearings. I couldn't remember what to do first. I finally got back into a rhythmn and was able to open and chat with Alicia about how the rest of her Vegas trip was while I was setting up. Before we opened, the manager asked me to ring in three to-go orders. He didn't usually do that, but I did. One was to be picked up at 1045, before we opened and before the togo person arrived. So I took care of that one. It was for a food delivery company. They just sign for it and there's never a tip. For the second order, the gentleman was early and left me a $20 tip. I was very pleasantly surprised. After that, I decided to keep the order that was arriving at 1115 instead of transfering it to the incoming togo person. That gentleman also tipped me $20. So, basically before we opened, I made $40. Then I collected my tips from my last shift that I'd left early from and it was $30. (It was super slow and I left three hours early.) So I was off to a good start on my first day back.
I kept all of this in the back of my mind as I watched the restaurant fill up, and the bar stay empty. I ran food for the other servers, sat tables for the hostesses...tried to keep busy. I hate just standing there and Caitlin had done such an awesome job prepping for me the day before, so there was very little to do. It was nearly 1pm before I got my first guest, but then I did get a pretty good round of guests at the bar.
Even when I wasn't busy, and there was no one at the bar, I felt calm. I felt like being away from work had "wussah-ed" me. My chi was in order, or whatever. My inner spirit was at peace. LOL
I usually get highly irritated when it's slow for me and I'm just standing there while everyone else is busy. I usually forget that I will eventually get guests, and that I will likely make more than the other servers who leave after being there for two hours. I always forget the big picture. I definitely need to work on my patience. But, today was different.
Today, I was the yoda of patience and calm. Today, I didn't care about the gossip. Today, I didn't care about all the nonsense that you always get swept up in at work.
And it was great. I had one of those days that reminded me why I like bartending. I had lots of separate individual guests and a few that brought companions; but it seemed as though they all came together by the end of their meals. Several of the single guests were chatting with each other, and I joined the conversation with them here and there when I could. It was generally fun, and pleasant and friendly today. Some days, it seems as though everyone is grumbly. Not today. And it was almost as though some of them, when sitting down, were actively looking for conversation. Sometimes you can almost feel them leaning towards you, beckoning with their eyes for you to converse with them and join them for lunch.
It never ceases to amaze me how people are able to send so much information out to each other without ever saying a word. From the moment someone sits at my bar, I can tell what type of experience they want. There are a few exceptions, like the person having a rotten day who is able to be disarmed and maybe even cheered up a little. Or the super-grumpy-when-hungry person who warms up considerably once they've eaten.
After work, I left and had an amazing first timer experience at Trader Joe's grocery store. Firstly, the drive there, on the back roads and not through highway traffic was gorgeous. Secondly, the store is amazing. Organic this, all natural that, fresh delicious bulk foods and produce. They were even cooking and serving pulled pork carnitas or something in the back that I sampled. The pork was delicious...though nowhere near as wonderful as the pulled pork and collard greens that I had on the 4th of July at Sabrina's neighbor's house. (they were so good that I snuck a plate for later back to the Delmos house to eat the next day).
I went to Joe's because I was looking for creme fraiche and cotija cheese for a bobby flay recipe that I wanted to try. Shockingly, (and by shockingly I mean completely not shockingly) the commissary had neither of these ingredients. Neither did Safeway. Joe's was great. They had a ton of things I'd love to try, and a meat department that would make a grill guy's wet grill dreams come true. I will definitely return, if for no other reason than to see what they are cooking in the back!
Upon returning home, my stress kicked in and I became uber bitch. I had no patience, and Adam needed to check something in the garage, I needed to make dinner (and it's always tough when you have to read the recipe as you go), Taylor was in full on crankston hughes mode, and it was a little overwhelming. Not to mention, Sabrina was coming. Oh, and the dog had been dining on her favorite delicacy, cat shit, outside the bathroom and I stepped on a forgotten morsel in bare feet.
I give it to Adam for dealing with my wrath with mostly grace, and vacuuming and mopping where the cat treat indulgence had taken place. He kept his cool, for the most part, as I lost my top. Finally, closer to dinner, I calmed a bit.
During dinner, I was trying to fill Sabrina in on our trip to Las Vegas, and Miss Punky Pants Taylor was definitely making it a challenge. Between the shrill pay-attention-to-me noise, the using of fingers to dip in ketchup and throwing of a fit because she wanted that big dirl cup, I must have repeated every sentence three times.
My patience almost non-existent, we cleaned up from dinner and Sabrina and I and the three monsters (I mean dogs) were off for our walk. Daddy braved the overtired toddler bath and bedtime chores in order to allow us to walk.
The dogs were also in rare form, pulling on the leash with no abandon or apology, crossing the leashes, tangling each other, lunging towards every bird, every dog, every person, every leaf. They were awful. And usually, by about mile two, they've calmed. Nope. Not this time. It was as though it was their first walk and they needed to see and do every single thing with urgency. They also, which was really weird, each pooped like three times. We had no bags and at one point, Sadie let loose in a very well manicured lawn. I took a sales flyer from a nearby house, and scooped it up and carried it half a mile to a trash receptacle. It was truly nauseating.
I guess today would classify as a sort of mixed bag day. I really think it's all in how you choose to feel. At work, because of the surprising great start, I felt at ease and more inclined to enjoy my day. At home, because of the unsurprising stressful dinner time hour, I felt like, well, sort of a tyrannical mess.
I'm glad that part is over, and sad that it wasn't enjoyable for Adam or Taylor. I am pretty sure that I wasn't the best company. I apologized though, and as I'd promised to do, returned home from my walk in a much better mood....to a husband sound asleep on the couch. =)
I kept all of this in the back of my mind as I watched the restaurant fill up, and the bar stay empty. I ran food for the other servers, sat tables for the hostesses...tried to keep busy. I hate just standing there and Caitlin had done such an awesome job prepping for me the day before, so there was very little to do. It was nearly 1pm before I got my first guest, but then I did get a pretty good round of guests at the bar.
Even when I wasn't busy, and there was no one at the bar, I felt calm. I felt like being away from work had "wussah-ed" me. My chi was in order, or whatever. My inner spirit was at peace. LOL
I usually get highly irritated when it's slow for me and I'm just standing there while everyone else is busy. I usually forget that I will eventually get guests, and that I will likely make more than the other servers who leave after being there for two hours. I always forget the big picture. I definitely need to work on my patience. But, today was different.
Today, I was the yoda of patience and calm. Today, I didn't care about the gossip. Today, I didn't care about all the nonsense that you always get swept up in at work.
And it was great. I had one of those days that reminded me why I like bartending. I had lots of separate individual guests and a few that brought companions; but it seemed as though they all came together by the end of their meals. Several of the single guests were chatting with each other, and I joined the conversation with them here and there when I could. It was generally fun, and pleasant and friendly today. Some days, it seems as though everyone is grumbly. Not today. And it was almost as though some of them, when sitting down, were actively looking for conversation. Sometimes you can almost feel them leaning towards you, beckoning with their eyes for you to converse with them and join them for lunch.
It never ceases to amaze me how people are able to send so much information out to each other without ever saying a word. From the moment someone sits at my bar, I can tell what type of experience they want. There are a few exceptions, like the person having a rotten day who is able to be disarmed and maybe even cheered up a little. Or the super-grumpy-when-hungry person who warms up considerably once they've eaten.
After work, I left and had an amazing first timer experience at Trader Joe's grocery store. Firstly, the drive there, on the back roads and not through highway traffic was gorgeous. Secondly, the store is amazing. Organic this, all natural that, fresh delicious bulk foods and produce. They were even cooking and serving pulled pork carnitas or something in the back that I sampled. The pork was delicious...though nowhere near as wonderful as the pulled pork and collard greens that I had on the 4th of July at Sabrina's neighbor's house. (they were so good that I snuck a plate for later back to the Delmos house to eat the next day).
I went to Joe's because I was looking for creme fraiche and cotija cheese for a bobby flay recipe that I wanted to try. Shockingly, (and by shockingly I mean completely not shockingly) the commissary had neither of these ingredients. Neither did Safeway. Joe's was great. They had a ton of things I'd love to try, and a meat department that would make a grill guy's wet grill dreams come true. I will definitely return, if for no other reason than to see what they are cooking in the back!
Upon returning home, my stress kicked in and I became uber bitch. I had no patience, and Adam needed to check something in the garage, I needed to make dinner (and it's always tough when you have to read the recipe as you go), Taylor was in full on crankston hughes mode, and it was a little overwhelming. Not to mention, Sabrina was coming. Oh, and the dog had been dining on her favorite delicacy, cat shit, outside the bathroom and I stepped on a forgotten morsel in bare feet.
I give it to Adam for dealing with my wrath with mostly grace, and vacuuming and mopping where the cat treat indulgence had taken place. He kept his cool, for the most part, as I lost my top. Finally, closer to dinner, I calmed a bit.
During dinner, I was trying to fill Sabrina in on our trip to Las Vegas, and Miss Punky Pants Taylor was definitely making it a challenge. Between the shrill pay-attention-to-me noise, the using of fingers to dip in ketchup and throwing of a fit because she wanted that big dirl cup, I must have repeated every sentence three times.
My patience almost non-existent, we cleaned up from dinner and Sabrina and I and the three monsters (I mean dogs) were off for our walk. Daddy braved the overtired toddler bath and bedtime chores in order to allow us to walk.
The dogs were also in rare form, pulling on the leash with no abandon or apology, crossing the leashes, tangling each other, lunging towards every bird, every dog, every person, every leaf. They were awful. And usually, by about mile two, they've calmed. Nope. Not this time. It was as though it was their first walk and they needed to see and do every single thing with urgency. They also, which was really weird, each pooped like three times. We had no bags and at one point, Sadie let loose in a very well manicured lawn. I took a sales flyer from a nearby house, and scooped it up and carried it half a mile to a trash receptacle. It was truly nauseating.
I guess today would classify as a sort of mixed bag day. I really think it's all in how you choose to feel. At work, because of the surprising great start, I felt at ease and more inclined to enjoy my day. At home, because of the unsurprising stressful dinner time hour, I felt like, well, sort of a tyrannical mess.
I'm glad that part is over, and sad that it wasn't enjoyable for Adam or Taylor. I am pretty sure that I wasn't the best company. I apologized though, and as I'd promised to do, returned home from my walk in a much better mood....to a husband sound asleep on the couch. =)
20July2010
And....I'm back!
After quite a long hiatus, I have returned! I have recently been feeling like something has been missing; like I've been more stressed than usual. I realized that my outlet for relief was the blog for quite awhile, and it wasn't being utilized. So, here I am.
Whether anyone reads or not, I've always enjoyed journaling and writing. So, I should keep doing it.
I feel like it's been so long since I've blogged, and so much has happened. Let's see. I only have about a half hour before I have to leave for my first day back to work after Las Vegas. (ugh. work. yay! money!)
Big events: After my last blog, we decided to plan a trip to Las Vegas. Big Drama, of which I will definitely get into at a later time. Sabrina and I went to Portland (not sure if that was blogged) after Adam left from leave. I decided I was enormous when I saw a picture of myself, so I made a personal decision to change it. (I've since lost 14 pounds; but I'm pretty sure I've gained a couple back from Las Vegas). April brought a lot of social events...the beer dinner, which was fun as always. It was IPAs, though, of which I'm not a big fan. Ah, and the now infamous Mariners game. Definitely much more to come about that. Dad and Susan came to visit, and we went to Vancouver and Victoria. Taylor was sick the whole time, and so it was pretty awful. Details to come for sure, because the ferry ride from Victoria to Port Angeles was quite....memorable. A week and a half after they left, Dana, Lori and Jeremy came to visit. Definitely a blast! Taylor just loved her Aunt Rori! I have pictures to go with all the stories of their visit! Taylor attended her first (that she was older than 4 months at) birthday party for a boy from her daycare and also her first baby shower. Adam came home June 9th. Of course, all the adjustment period from that is blogworthy. He had lots of time off for he and T to fall in love all over again. Most recently, we went to Las Vegas for four days while Mom and Memeir watched Taylor. Vegas definitely deserves attention here, and so does the instantaneous and uber strong bond that Taylor and her Gamma have. We had her birthday party, and I made way too much food; but we definitely had a great time.
What's next? Well, perhaps soon to come....details about Adam's orders for recruiter school, our trip with the Delmos and Ortizes to a cabin near Leavenworth, Taylor's month in a different daycare home while Darina is on leave (which reminds me that I need to update on her month at the daycare center and the atrocious home she was going to go to), my attempt to get us to Silverwood Theme Park before the end of summer, and Daddy and Aunt Sabrina's birthdays. What a busy summer we'll have!
Well, I'll start from March tonight when I have more time to spare.
Tata, for now.
After quite a long hiatus, I have returned! I have recently been feeling like something has been missing; like I've been more stressed than usual. I realized that my outlet for relief was the blog for quite awhile, and it wasn't being utilized. So, here I am.
Whether anyone reads or not, I've always enjoyed journaling and writing. So, I should keep doing it.
I feel like it's been so long since I've blogged, and so much has happened. Let's see. I only have about a half hour before I have to leave for my first day back to work after Las Vegas. (ugh. work. yay! money!)
Big events: After my last blog, we decided to plan a trip to Las Vegas. Big Drama, of which I will definitely get into at a later time. Sabrina and I went to Portland (not sure if that was blogged) after Adam left from leave. I decided I was enormous when I saw a picture of myself, so I made a personal decision to change it. (I've since lost 14 pounds; but I'm pretty sure I've gained a couple back from Las Vegas). April brought a lot of social events...the beer dinner, which was fun as always. It was IPAs, though, of which I'm not a big fan. Ah, and the now infamous Mariners game. Definitely much more to come about that. Dad and Susan came to visit, and we went to Vancouver and Victoria. Taylor was sick the whole time, and so it was pretty awful. Details to come for sure, because the ferry ride from Victoria to Port Angeles was quite....memorable. A week and a half after they left, Dana, Lori and Jeremy came to visit. Definitely a blast! Taylor just loved her Aunt Rori! I have pictures to go with all the stories of their visit! Taylor attended her first (that she was older than 4 months at) birthday party for a boy from her daycare and also her first baby shower. Adam came home June 9th. Of course, all the adjustment period from that is blogworthy. He had lots of time off for he and T to fall in love all over again. Most recently, we went to Las Vegas for four days while Mom and Memeir watched Taylor. Vegas definitely deserves attention here, and so does the instantaneous and uber strong bond that Taylor and her Gamma have. We had her birthday party, and I made way too much food; but we definitely had a great time.
What's next? Well, perhaps soon to come....details about Adam's orders for recruiter school, our trip with the Delmos and Ortizes to a cabin near Leavenworth, Taylor's month in a different daycare home while Darina is on leave (which reminds me that I need to update on her month at the daycare center and the atrocious home she was going to go to), my attempt to get us to Silverwood Theme Park before the end of summer, and Daddy and Aunt Sabrina's birthdays. What a busy summer we'll have!
Well, I'll start from March tonight when I have more time to spare.
Tata, for now.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
30Mar2010
Today I had a lesson in...humility? Not sure what to call how I feel. I arrived to work at my usual time, expecting to be busy because they were busy yesterday. I also expected to have a lot of work to do because I'd been off for three days; and to be frank -- I am anal about my bar. Plus, with some new meat behind the bar, and a busy weekend...some things don't get done.
What I found, was infuriating. Not only were my expectations met; but it was worse than I thought. I was livid, and running out of time to get everything done before the rush hit. After that, it was over. I left a few notes in the book and complained loudly to the usual people that milled about in the morning, including a manager. There was a lot to be done that should have been done, and some things that might affect what we were able to do for the guests.
Later, as I sat and had dinner I realized that I had forgotten to put away all the wine that had just been delivered. Swallowing my own foot, I texted the night bartenders (the same that had worked the night before and were the object of most of my scathing criticisms) and asked them to finish before the managers (one of which is the one I was complaining to this morning) arrived to do inventory and discover my forgotten and incomplete task.
Needless to say, I see the err of my ways. It's god telling me to shut the hell up and be more tolerant, patient, understanding, and less critical of others. I, myself, am not perfect. I guess sometimes I just need to be reminded of that fact.
What I found, was infuriating. Not only were my expectations met; but it was worse than I thought. I was livid, and running out of time to get everything done before the rush hit. After that, it was over. I left a few notes in the book and complained loudly to the usual people that milled about in the morning, including a manager. There was a lot to be done that should have been done, and some things that might affect what we were able to do for the guests.
Later, as I sat and had dinner I realized that I had forgotten to put away all the wine that had just been delivered. Swallowing my own foot, I texted the night bartenders (the same that had worked the night before and were the object of most of my scathing criticisms) and asked them to finish before the managers (one of which is the one I was complaining to this morning) arrived to do inventory and discover my forgotten and incomplete task.
Needless to say, I see the err of my ways. It's god telling me to shut the hell up and be more tolerant, patient, understanding, and less critical of others. I, myself, am not perfect. I guess sometimes I just need to be reminded of that fact.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
28March2010 2
I guess I was blogging after midnight last night, because I dated it today's date. Weird, because for the last week; I've been really confused about the date and can't seem to keep track of it. I'm pretty sure it's because it isn't important to me. I've determined that, for the most part, we remember what we want to remember, what we're interested in. I know that I've been preoccupied with losing weight, getting healthy; I've been obsessing about food. I really don't like the nutri system food. It's pretty gross. I have found myself starving all weekend. Plus, it has way too much fiber if you know what I mean.
I'm not going to renew the "subscription". I'll finish the two weeks, but I'm definitely supplementing with REAL food. The bars, desserts, and breakfast items are actually pretty good. Anything with chicken was gross, and obviously not fresh. Any kind of meat or dairy product (usually refrigerated) that can somehow sit on a shelf in a grocery store, unrefrigerated- freaks me out. It's just not normal. And I honestly feel wrong eating it. I feel like something is wrong, like I am going against what I really feel.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about the organic debate and whether or not it is healthier, whether or not it makes a difference. I really want to learn more and want to take Dana, Jeremy, and Lori to an organic farm when they come. I'd like for us all to learn more. I even found myself in the comissary today looking at the produce and trying to figure out where it was grown, and how. I noticed, for the first time, that the commissary lists the country where each produce item is grown. I did have trouble finding out where the organic stuff was grown though. I mean, not only is eating organic important to me, but I'd like to eat local as much as possible.
I've also learned that eating organic is next to impossible when you eat out. Very few, and even fewer kid friendly, organic restaurants (even here in overly eco-conscious Washington state) exist. Almost no one advertises grass fed beef. While a lot of chef-owned, higher end, kid unfriendly places do use local this and that or cage free eggs; there is really not a lot available for budget minded, environmentally and socially conscientious families.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not throwing out my leather shoes, or holding up a picket sign against or for anything. I just want more choices. The grocery stores are all on board with healthier eating, better and fresher choices. Why aren't the restaurants? I'm sure that the answer to that is really complicated. I'm sure that (please, try to bear with the conspiracy theorist inside of me) Applebee's is somehow in bed with ConAgra and/or the logistics of a national restaurant chain keeping its food consistent while using local ingredients are probably the barriers to creating the concept that I speak of; but someone out there should do it. Is it financially feasible? There are a million reasons why it probably hasn't been done; not least of all the fact that the economy is horrible and opening something right now wouldn't be the wisest idea.
Well, at least I can buy and cook what I want, for the most part. I can make a choice to buy natural foods. And, if I don't want to, I don't have to. But, I definitely won't be buying anymore Nutrisystem fettucini alfredo dry-pasta-and-seasonings-in-a-cup-just-add-water-and-it-tasted-more-like-noodle-soup-than-alfredo. That's for sure.
I'm not going to renew the "subscription". I'll finish the two weeks, but I'm definitely supplementing with REAL food. The bars, desserts, and breakfast items are actually pretty good. Anything with chicken was gross, and obviously not fresh. Any kind of meat or dairy product (usually refrigerated) that can somehow sit on a shelf in a grocery store, unrefrigerated- freaks me out. It's just not normal. And I honestly feel wrong eating it. I feel like something is wrong, like I am going against what I really feel.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about the organic debate and whether or not it is healthier, whether or not it makes a difference. I really want to learn more and want to take Dana, Jeremy, and Lori to an organic farm when they come. I'd like for us all to learn more. I even found myself in the comissary today looking at the produce and trying to figure out where it was grown, and how. I noticed, for the first time, that the commissary lists the country where each produce item is grown. I did have trouble finding out where the organic stuff was grown though. I mean, not only is eating organic important to me, but I'd like to eat local as much as possible.
I've also learned that eating organic is next to impossible when you eat out. Very few, and even fewer kid friendly, organic restaurants (even here in overly eco-conscious Washington state) exist. Almost no one advertises grass fed beef. While a lot of chef-owned, higher end, kid unfriendly places do use local this and that or cage free eggs; there is really not a lot available for budget minded, environmentally and socially conscientious families.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not throwing out my leather shoes, or holding up a picket sign against or for anything. I just want more choices. The grocery stores are all on board with healthier eating, better and fresher choices. Why aren't the restaurants? I'm sure that the answer to that is really complicated. I'm sure that (please, try to bear with the conspiracy theorist inside of me) Applebee's is somehow in bed with ConAgra and/or the logistics of a national restaurant chain keeping its food consistent while using local ingredients are probably the barriers to creating the concept that I speak of; but someone out there should do it. Is it financially feasible? There are a million reasons why it probably hasn't been done; not least of all the fact that the economy is horrible and opening something right now wouldn't be the wisest idea.
Well, at least I can buy and cook what I want, for the most part. I can make a choice to buy natural foods. And, if I don't want to, I don't have to. But, I definitely won't be buying anymore Nutrisystem fettucini alfredo dry-pasta-and-seasonings-in-a-cup-just-add-water-and-it-tasted-more-like-noodle-soup-than-alfredo. That's for sure.
28March2010
Yesterday, Rylee and I took Taylor and Jax to Oly for dinner. We went to Cascadia Grill, which is right downtown, for burgers. I know what you're saying already. What happened to Nutri System? Well, let's just say that yesteday, I needed a burger. And I was starving from sitting around thinking about how hungry I was all day. LOL. As we drive downtown, it strikes me. First, downtown has no skyscrapers or anything of that nature. It really just looks like a small town downtown. I like that. Then I notice them. Everyone is still lost in the land of grunge. All the clothing is neutral, and flowy, or jeans too tight, hair in dreadlocks. It was apparent that Oly is very hippy and in some cases, obviously mentally ill and homeless. I kind of like artsy, weirdness. Portland, Seattle - both artsy and weird. But at least there, it looked like everyone showered on a regular basis. I don't know that I could say that for Oly. So we circled around and found parking. There were a lot of people milling about, as it was a beautiful day. We crossed over to the burger place, and as we entered we were struck by the decor. There were old school black and white photos or people in a 3d cardboard cityscape kind of design up on top of a high plant ledge. The bar, to the left, reminded me a bit of a saloon. We waited to be sat, and the waitress probably walked by us at least twice before we had to ask where we sit or if we wait. She said she'd be back to seat us in a few minutes, not once cracking an iota of a smile. She didn't look like she smiled much in general. Great, I thought, she's one of those unfriendly professional waitress types. How can these people get by thinking they are entitled to a tip? Isn't tipping based on service? I tip because of tipping karma; but you can tell the difference between a bad day and a sour, undynamic personality. These are people better off not dealing with the public. These are people that make you feel like they are doing you a favor to bring you what you order. I hate that. Anyway, after we were seated, Taylor decided to check out the acoustics of the room by stretching her vocal cords a bit. This was much to my embarassment, and so we attempted to explain to her to use her quiet voice while Jax was sleeping, and that other people were eating and so on and so forth. Really, she just needed to be engaged and distracted. I started to point out things outside, and name colors of things. This worked when there were people walking by to watch.
I ordered a glass of Bodega Malbec (which was $6, and upon inspecting online, is only like $7 a bottle) and it was actually pretty good. Nice and bold, with some buttery creamy notes. I like wine that makes me want to chew it. Weird, I know; but I do. We had hummus and veggies and pita as an appetizer and it was delicious. I also ordered a sofrito burger, medium rare.
When it came, it was well done; which I hate - but I would rather just eat it than wait for another one. There was way too much bread, and it was too hard on the outside to get a proper bite. Because the burger was so big, all of the lovely roasted peppers and onions would slide off of the other side of the burger as I tried to bite it. The smoked cheese on top was the only saving grace. Needless to say, I would not return.
Instead of opting for dessert, as the natives (Taylor) were restless, we opted to walk around the water and downtown area and trek back to suburban civilization to get Coldstone after our walk.
(P.S. Taylor is super hungry this morning. She's eaten a veggie sausage patty, two eggs, and half of a tomato!)
Our trek proved to be equal parts interesting and terrifying from a people watching perspective. We came to an area of fountains that rose in various patterns in the concrete, which was an immediate invitation to Taylor to run around them. We did, and I tried to keep us dry. I kept her drier than I did myself, and we moved on. As we left, a man approached and proceeded to take off his hand-me-down, dirty camoflauge jacket and run into dancing streams of water. Honestly, it was nice out; but it was cold. We left quickly, hoping not to catch his attention...or odor.
As we crossed into a small park square with gazebos, I noticed two girls in one of them. They looked young, teenagers, and looked like they were reading from papers and acting out a script. An older man approached us, wearing age innappropriate clothing, asking us to buy two beanie babies he had in his hands. He gestured them towards Taylor, as if she'd make the decision for me. "They're brand new." He said. Not a chance, dude.
We decided, as dusk approached, and more and more homeless and transient looking people started to come out of the woodwork that it was time to leave.
Coldstone was a funy experience. As we entered, I noticed that Taylor had peed through her pants on both sides! Shocked, we trekked back to the car with the intention to scrap the venture in favor of pints from the grocery store and a short trip back home to clean clothes. Instead, I found that I was strangely prepared and had a spare pair of pants in the car. They even matched what she was wearing. I changed her, and Rylee changed Jax, and off we went into Coldstone. There was a line, of course; but it seemed to move quickly. Never quick enough for Miss T, she was all over the place. She found a boy a year or two older than her and proceeded to flirt with him shamelessly and talk about the ice cream in the case. Finally, we ordered. I got her strawberry with sprinkles, and a kid sized cake batter for myself. Rylee got the berry berry good that Adam usually gets. We sat outside at one of the table, and that's when my favorite moment from the whole day happened.
As Taylor would scoop her mini spoon into her ice cream, she would giggle. Every single time, she laughed. She'd get near the ice cream and this laugh would come from her. It was like she couldn't control it. It was as though she had such joy, and such a feeling of satisfaction from this ice cream. It was a deliberate, conquering laugh. As if she was telling the ice cream that she'd won and was going to eat every last bite. When she thought she was done (because she couldn't see the ice cream hiding in fear on the inside of the cup), she turned her spoon's attention to my ice cream - without asking, apologizing or any sort of inclination that it wasn't her ice cream. I rearranged her cup and she was back to her victorious giggling and scooping.
The whole thing was hilarious. And definitely worth the trip. I can't wait until Adam is home and can see her wreckless abandon with ice cream. It takes me two sittings to eat a kid's sized ice cream from Coldstone; and she'd finished hers in record time - just like her daddy.
He'd be so proud of his little ice cream warrior.
I ordered a glass of Bodega Malbec (which was $6, and upon inspecting online, is only like $7 a bottle) and it was actually pretty good. Nice and bold, with some buttery creamy notes. I like wine that makes me want to chew it. Weird, I know; but I do. We had hummus and veggies and pita as an appetizer and it was delicious. I also ordered a sofrito burger, medium rare.
When it came, it was well done; which I hate - but I would rather just eat it than wait for another one. There was way too much bread, and it was too hard on the outside to get a proper bite. Because the burger was so big, all of the lovely roasted peppers and onions would slide off of the other side of the burger as I tried to bite it. The smoked cheese on top was the only saving grace. Needless to say, I would not return.
Instead of opting for dessert, as the natives (Taylor) were restless, we opted to walk around the water and downtown area and trek back to suburban civilization to get Coldstone after our walk.
(P.S. Taylor is super hungry this morning. She's eaten a veggie sausage patty, two eggs, and half of a tomato!)
Our trek proved to be equal parts interesting and terrifying from a people watching perspective. We came to an area of fountains that rose in various patterns in the concrete, which was an immediate invitation to Taylor to run around them. We did, and I tried to keep us dry. I kept her drier than I did myself, and we moved on. As we left, a man approached and proceeded to take off his hand-me-down, dirty camoflauge jacket and run into dancing streams of water. Honestly, it was nice out; but it was cold. We left quickly, hoping not to catch his attention...or odor.
As we crossed into a small park square with gazebos, I noticed two girls in one of them. They looked young, teenagers, and looked like they were reading from papers and acting out a script. An older man approached us, wearing age innappropriate clothing, asking us to buy two beanie babies he had in his hands. He gestured them towards Taylor, as if she'd make the decision for me. "They're brand new." He said. Not a chance, dude.
We decided, as dusk approached, and more and more homeless and transient looking people started to come out of the woodwork that it was time to leave.
Coldstone was a funy experience. As we entered, I noticed that Taylor had peed through her pants on both sides! Shocked, we trekked back to the car with the intention to scrap the venture in favor of pints from the grocery store and a short trip back home to clean clothes. Instead, I found that I was strangely prepared and had a spare pair of pants in the car. They even matched what she was wearing. I changed her, and Rylee changed Jax, and off we went into Coldstone. There was a line, of course; but it seemed to move quickly. Never quick enough for Miss T, she was all over the place. She found a boy a year or two older than her and proceeded to flirt with him shamelessly and talk about the ice cream in the case. Finally, we ordered. I got her strawberry with sprinkles, and a kid sized cake batter for myself. Rylee got the berry berry good that Adam usually gets. We sat outside at one of the table, and that's when my favorite moment from the whole day happened.
As Taylor would scoop her mini spoon into her ice cream, she would giggle. Every single time, she laughed. She'd get near the ice cream and this laugh would come from her. It was like she couldn't control it. It was as though she had such joy, and such a feeling of satisfaction from this ice cream. It was a deliberate, conquering laugh. As if she was telling the ice cream that she'd won and was going to eat every last bite. When she thought she was done (because she couldn't see the ice cream hiding in fear on the inside of the cup), she turned her spoon's attention to my ice cream - without asking, apologizing or any sort of inclination that it wasn't her ice cream. I rearranged her cup and she was back to her victorious giggling and scooping.
The whole thing was hilarious. And definitely worth the trip. I can't wait until Adam is home and can see her wreckless abandon with ice cream. It takes me two sittings to eat a kid's sized ice cream from Coldstone; and she'd finished hers in record time - just like her daddy.
He'd be so proud of his little ice cream warrior.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
27Mar2010
It's been awhile since I've been on; and I am super excited to be able to update the blog from the very comfortable sofa in my living room. My netbook has arrived, and I love it to pieces! P.S. It's pink. So now, I am free to update my blog while laying in bed, sipping coffee at (anywhere but Starbucks, yuck), or even while simultaneously enjoying a recently DVRed episode of Criminal Minds.
I've started going to the gym since the last blog. Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday I go with Amelia from work. I have actually started to really enjoy the elliptical machine. It's definitely a personal challenge each time I get on it- go five minutes longer, faster to burn more calories than last time, sweat a little more...I ordered Nutri System, and started it yesterday. It's, so far, not that bad. I can't say that it's the most delicious food that I've ever had; but it isn't horrendous. It's edible and that was all I was really looking for. It allows you to track your weight, food, and exercise for each day online, too. I like that. It prompted me to measure out the creamer that I usually use each morning in my coffee. Typically, I just pour it into freshly brewed coffee in my oversized 25 ounce cup. Yesterday, I measured it. 14 tablespoons later, I was shocked and disgusted and truly beginning to understand exactly why I am overweight. To be clear, that's 280 calories of coffee creamer. I immediately thought, I'd much rather eat those 280 calories. Or, not injest them at all. That is about how much I'd burned the day before on the elliptical. So I am basically exercising in order to drink my coffee every day. I love my coffee, but I also love the idea of loving my body. So, I resolved to cut my coffee intake in half and continue to measure the creamer.
I also realized that I am or was, totally unaware of what I was eating. It really got me thinking. A few crackers here, fnishing Taylor's macaroni and cheese there, a french fry or three while working, a slice of a pizza that was made incorrectly...it all adds up, and quickly. I like the nutri system because it forces me to know what I am eating and drinking. For instance, I am a professed lover of vodka and knowing now that vodka has seventy calories PER OUNCE really has enticed me not to drink any.
And that's saying something....
I've started going to the gym since the last blog. Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday I go with Amelia from work. I have actually started to really enjoy the elliptical machine. It's definitely a personal challenge each time I get on it- go five minutes longer, faster to burn more calories than last time, sweat a little more...I ordered Nutri System, and started it yesterday. It's, so far, not that bad. I can't say that it's the most delicious food that I've ever had; but it isn't horrendous. It's edible and that was all I was really looking for. It allows you to track your weight, food, and exercise for each day online, too. I like that. It prompted me to measure out the creamer that I usually use each morning in my coffee. Typically, I just pour it into freshly brewed coffee in my oversized 25 ounce cup. Yesterday, I measured it. 14 tablespoons later, I was shocked and disgusted and truly beginning to understand exactly why I am overweight. To be clear, that's 280 calories of coffee creamer. I immediately thought, I'd much rather eat those 280 calories. Or, not injest them at all. That is about how much I'd burned the day before on the elliptical. So I am basically exercising in order to drink my coffee every day. I love my coffee, but I also love the idea of loving my body. So, I resolved to cut my coffee intake in half and continue to measure the creamer.
I also realized that I am or was, totally unaware of what I was eating. It really got me thinking. A few crackers here, fnishing Taylor's macaroni and cheese there, a french fry or three while working, a slice of a pizza that was made incorrectly...it all adds up, and quickly. I like the nutri system because it forces me to know what I am eating and drinking. For instance, I am a professed lover of vodka and knowing now that vodka has seventy calories PER OUNCE really has enticed me not to drink any.
And that's saying something....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)