So I've determined something else that I really miss, not about Adam (sorry baby, but it's not going to be as bad as the setup sounds), but about having him here. Freedom. The freedom to leave and run to the store really quickly, the freedom to run into a store and leave Taylor in the car because he's there too, the freedom to not be the one who has to carry everything everywhere all the time....you get the idea. (the freedom to sleep in!) ok, now i'm bordering overcomplaining.
Today was super slow, leaving me and my thoughts to focus on being hungry (who knows if I really was, I was just bored) and unsatisfied. I'm unsatisfied when I'm not busy. As a general rule. I like to be busy. I don't like to be given all this time to think about what I could be doing with my time instead of the nothing I am currently doing. I find that the less I think, the better off I am. I do tend to get a bit disorganized, run late to social events, and forget to pack bibs and diapers. But, I am happier. So either work needs to pick up, or I need new work- (which is not an idea I am particularly fond of). Enough. complaining.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
6Oct2009 - Day 60
Day 60 sucked. Slow at work. Stressed about (everything) money, money, buying plane tickets, cleaning, what to eat for dinner, couch cleaning, money, and taylor is a ginorm punky pants because she had no nap.
I quit!
I quit!
Monday, October 5, 2009
5oCT2009 - Day 59
Today was a rare uber productive day. We arose around the usual 730 at the Delmos house. After changing one of the grossest diapers ever, and getting ready, we went down to eat breakfast and get ready to leave for the Little Gym class. We ran a few minutes late, because I left my coffee on the counter - and that just will not do - but I noticed a few other parents and tots arriving late as well. The skill of the week was backwards rolls, which Taylor wasn't too keen on. She is, however, super keen on the balance beam and tries constantly to walk across it without help. She also seemed more interested in participating with the group today. It was a fun class, and I totally need the bubble blower that the teacher has. It's from Gymboree. I'm so there!
After class, I dropped the mayter at Darina's and went to mail a package to Adam and one to Dana. At home, I ate indian leftovers from the Delmos, and waited for them to arrive to begin the cleaning day. They arrived, Subway in hand, and we planned our strategy over lunch. Sabrina and I tackled the rearranging and cleaning. Delmo tackled cutting down a shelving unit to fit in the niche above the fireplace. He also put Taylor's basketball hoop together, and we made a list of things he'll need for next Monday. We plan on fixing the broken pieces of base moulding, changing Adam's tires to winter tires, hanging a curtain to cover the niche, and running some wires here and there.
Tonight we all went to Azteca for dinner for Delmos birthday. We're all gettin' old. He's the baby, though, turning 26 tomorrow. Sabrina and I split a present for him, an ipod dock that integrates into his surround sound and goes in the wall. (or something like that!) She also did something else for him that he can't find out until tomorrow, so on the super off chance (they're all at the Heagles drinkin' tonight) that he reads this, I'll wait to post what it is until tomorrow. She wasn't planning on telling him until his real birthday.
It was a great dinner. Joseph and his baby (ten months) and his baby mama came as well. The baby is adorable, and looks like him. It was good to see him, and a touch awkward since we haven't really talked much since he moved to Florida. The woman seemed nice enough, and his son was super well behaved during dinner. Taylor was as well, until she was done. At that point, Ashlyn (the Heagles daughter) got up and was walking around with Taylor. This thrilled Taylor to death. She just loved hanging around the other older kids. She'd even imitate them and try to do the hand gestures they were doing. It was really cute. Well, home to a clean house is really nice. We'll tackle the kitchen, and upstairs next week. Goodnight.
After class, I dropped the mayter at Darina's and went to mail a package to Adam and one to Dana. At home, I ate indian leftovers from the Delmos, and waited for them to arrive to begin the cleaning day. They arrived, Subway in hand, and we planned our strategy over lunch. Sabrina and I tackled the rearranging and cleaning. Delmo tackled cutting down a shelving unit to fit in the niche above the fireplace. He also put Taylor's basketball hoop together, and we made a list of things he'll need for next Monday. We plan on fixing the broken pieces of base moulding, changing Adam's tires to winter tires, hanging a curtain to cover the niche, and running some wires here and there.
Tonight we all went to Azteca for dinner for Delmos birthday. We're all gettin' old. He's the baby, though, turning 26 tomorrow. Sabrina and I split a present for him, an ipod dock that integrates into his surround sound and goes in the wall. (or something like that!) She also did something else for him that he can't find out until tomorrow, so on the super off chance (they're all at the Heagles drinkin' tonight) that he reads this, I'll wait to post what it is until tomorrow. She wasn't planning on telling him until his real birthday.
It was a great dinner. Joseph and his baby (ten months) and his baby mama came as well. The baby is adorable, and looks like him. It was good to see him, and a touch awkward since we haven't really talked much since he moved to Florida. The woman seemed nice enough, and his son was super well behaved during dinner. Taylor was as well, until she was done. At that point, Ashlyn (the Heagles daughter) got up and was walking around with Taylor. This thrilled Taylor to death. She just loved hanging around the other older kids. She'd even imitate them and try to do the hand gestures they were doing. It was really cute. Well, home to a clean house is really nice. We'll tackle the kitchen, and upstairs next week. Goodnight.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
4Oct2009 - Day 58
I slept in today. I'm not so sure that Taylor did; because I heard her talking and squirming around sometime during the 8am hour. I felt slightly guilty, laying in bed those extra few minutes; but when she's in her crib in the morning (unless she sees me) she's totally happy and content and not fussing at all. As soon as she sees me, she can't be placed back in the crib without a total fit. So around 9am, I, the bad sleeping in mommy, went and got her. She was totally content; and greeted me as I went into the room. Sadie was in tow, as she was due to go outside and had determined that I had no idea that she needed to go out; and was going to remind me of it every 6 seconds or so. Taylor said, "hi baby!" as I opened the door and we played the taylor-runs-all-over-the-crib-while-mommy-tries-to-scoop-her-out game. I got her changed up, and downstairs we went. I placed her in her high chair. She knew where she was, and made the sign for "hungry" to let me know she wanted breakfast. This is all new, and I've been trying to teach her various signs. I was so proud that she did it on her own. I gave her a tray full of cheerios, which placated her, and took Sadie outside. Because we were late getting out there, it didn't take her long to poop; meaning we could come back in. Breakfast was good; then we spent the better part of the morning watching handy manny on disney channel and me reading people magazine. She found a random copy of another people magazine and brought it to me to read to her. She has been doing this a lot; and turning around then plopping into my lap for me to read it to her. Around 11, I decided that it was naptime. We went up to my bed, and she seemed to concur with my feelings about naptime; because she went to asleep as soon as I placed her in the bed. We slept for about two hours (oh heaven!), but I must be honest when I say that I am not used to sleeping and having naps so I really don't feel like I slept much. I feel like I spent the better part of that time trying to sleep. Well, when she's awake; there is no going back to sleep, so we were up. We showered, and I do mean we. I did my shower, then brought her in and washed her up. She seemed curious (at best) about what was going on. She truly didn't love it. Especially the part where her head got wet in the shower. We dressed, she slipped on the wet floor a few times. I decided that no makeup and no blow drying of the hair was best. I was going au natural today. (Don't get that confused with comando. lol)
We got ourselves packed, while having lunch, and then headed out to do our errands before going to the Delmos house. On base, to the PX, to pick up various movies, video games, board games for daddy. To delmos house, to drop off taylor; then I went to walmart to pick up my pictures. (To send to Adam, of course) Delmo had originally wanted Indian food for his birthday; but folks are picky, so he settled for mexican food. So I called Sabrina at work to see what he would like, and planned on ordering Indian carry out to take over to their house. She picked it up, because the restaurant was in Puyallup. He was really happy; but it was like $70 for what $30 of chinese food would cost. Damn his sophisticated palette. Either way, it was good. Tomorrow, we have the little gym class and then they are coming to house to help me. Woman and I are going to clean; and Delmo is going to put shelves in the area above the fireplace and perhaps change Adam's tires to winter tires. I'm just stoked that the house will be clean. It seems I never have enough time to get it all done. Thank goodness for awesome friends!
We got ourselves packed, while having lunch, and then headed out to do our errands before going to the Delmos house. On base, to the PX, to pick up various movies, video games, board games for daddy. To delmos house, to drop off taylor; then I went to walmart to pick up my pictures. (To send to Adam, of course) Delmo had originally wanted Indian food for his birthday; but folks are picky, so he settled for mexican food. So I called Sabrina at work to see what he would like, and planned on ordering Indian carry out to take over to their house. She picked it up, because the restaurant was in Puyallup. He was really happy; but it was like $70 for what $30 of chinese food would cost. Damn his sophisticated palette. Either way, it was good. Tomorrow, we have the little gym class and then they are coming to house to help me. Woman and I are going to clean; and Delmo is going to put shelves in the area above the fireplace and perhaps change Adam's tires to winter tires. I'm just stoked that the house will be clean. It seems I never have enough time to get it all done. Thank goodness for awesome friends!
3Oct2009 - Day 57
There is nothing I enjoy more than a great day of shopping. I was so caught up in the shopping moment today, that I paid full price for two sweaters. Usually, for what I pay for these two sweaters I can get several items of clothing.
They are great, though. I'm still undecided about Taylor's halloween costume. It seems that the only tomato costume for kids is one from "veggie tales"; which has this huge face on it. I hate it. And I am for sure not making one. I can barely get the trash and recycling down to the curb; let alone sew an entire costume. Delmo's birthday is on Tuesday. I wanted to get him a lifesized cardboard cut out of Adam (in a red shirt and plaid shorts, of course)(they both seemed to show up to multiple events in the same outfit over the summer) to keep him "man company" while Adam is deployed. I can tell that the lack of quality man time is starting to get to him. Poor Delmo. It would only be worse if we were all preggers. LOL
They are great, though. I'm still undecided about Taylor's halloween costume. It seems that the only tomato costume for kids is one from "veggie tales"; which has this huge face on it. I hate it. And I am for sure not making one. I can barely get the trash and recycling down to the curb; let alone sew an entire costume. Delmo's birthday is on Tuesday. I wanted to get him a lifesized cardboard cut out of Adam (in a red shirt and plaid shorts, of course)(they both seemed to show up to multiple events in the same outfit over the summer) to keep him "man company" while Adam is deployed. I can tell that the lack of quality man time is starting to get to him. Poor Delmo. It would only be worse if we were all preggers. LOL
Friday, October 2, 2009
2Oct2009 - Day 56
Ah, the end of the work week. The end of one beer, and beginning of another. LOL. Tomorrow is Rylee saturday, and I am really looking forward to it. Otherwise, a pretty standard and uneventful; not bad; but regular (unextraordinary) day. Perhaps, today was extraordinary because it was so ordinary.
Allow me to clarify...
Ok, so I've got nothin'. But I had a good day. Only because it wasn't a bad day. It wasn't a great day. Just a good one.
Can't really ask for much more than that.
Allow me to clarify...
Ok, so I've got nothin'. But I had a good day. Only because it wasn't a bad day. It wasn't a great day. Just a good one.
Can't really ask for much more than that.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
1Oct2009 - Day 55
a few parts absolut apeach, a few parts simply orange juice w/mango, a few spritzs of whipped cream. ahhh, a peachy orangey creamy lovely ending to a pretty alright day. I thought about Adam a lot today. (dry your eyes, family members who can't read the blog without breaking out the costco pack of tissues) I miss him. But, I have to be honest. I am truly proud of myself. I don't feel depressed. In fact, perhaps since having Taylor, I feel more emotionally stable than in my whole life. I've always felt prone to depression, and been really lonely. But, since her, I feel like I am stronger. I am wiser. (lol- Instant yoda, just add baby?) It's strange, the almost instantaneous change I felt. Plus, I'm now in that special "I'm a mom" club. That one is taking some getting used to. When I am talking to people, particularly at work (guests or coworkers) and I say "my daughter" or hear someone say "I'm a mom" followed by some comment that only moms get to make, I have weird mixed reactions. Sometimes I am sheepish, sometimes I am proud, sometimes I am a touch self-conscious. (Mostly of the post mommy body.)
Tonight was great, with Taylor. When we got home, we had dinner. She ate a ton! She saw a pear on the counter, and before I'd even decided what to cook for dinner, was pointing to it and trying (albeit totally in vain) to reach for it on the counter. So, I peeled and cubed it for her; she'd walked to her high chair already and was attempting (also in vain) to climb up into it. (All of these things are firsts, by the way. She is truly learnind how to communicate her wants and needs more effectively than ever before.) I gave her a bowl of pear while I ate a 100 calorie bag of chocolate covered pretzels. We ate together, and she didn't even throw one piece on the floor. I thought she'd be full from all the soup and snacks she'd had at Darina's. (She said that Taylor had eaten a lot today.) I then gave her half a slice of peanut butter and grape jelly whole wheat toast. She housed it. I ate the other half. Then we each ate a slice of turkey bologna. Then I ate a string cheese, and she ate two bites of hers before she accidentally dropped it on the floor and Sadie quickly devoured it. Afterwards, we sat at the computer because I'd heard her say "dada" a few times tonight. I turned it on, and the background is of her and her daddy. She was thrilled. She pointed and smiled and said "dada" and "daddy" and "baby". It was moving. I was so excited. She knows her daddy, still. Most times that I show her pictures of him, I don't get much of a response (probably due to a short attention span) but this time she was enthralled! I turned on the dvd (still in the dvd drive of the computer) of her daddy reading her "Oh the places you'll go!" She smiled and giggled and paid attention almost half way through the book. (quite an achievement!) It's these types of things that really make the day, and the sacrafices we make, totally worth it.
Tonight was great, with Taylor. When we got home, we had dinner. She ate a ton! She saw a pear on the counter, and before I'd even decided what to cook for dinner, was pointing to it and trying (albeit totally in vain) to reach for it on the counter. So, I peeled and cubed it for her; she'd walked to her high chair already and was attempting (also in vain) to climb up into it. (All of these things are firsts, by the way. She is truly learnind how to communicate her wants and needs more effectively than ever before.) I gave her a bowl of pear while I ate a 100 calorie bag of chocolate covered pretzels. We ate together, and she didn't even throw one piece on the floor. I thought she'd be full from all the soup and snacks she'd had at Darina's. (She said that Taylor had eaten a lot today.) I then gave her half a slice of peanut butter and grape jelly whole wheat toast. She housed it. I ate the other half. Then we each ate a slice of turkey bologna. Then I ate a string cheese, and she ate two bites of hers before she accidentally dropped it on the floor and Sadie quickly devoured it. Afterwards, we sat at the computer because I'd heard her say "dada" a few times tonight. I turned it on, and the background is of her and her daddy. She was thrilled. She pointed and smiled and said "dada" and "daddy" and "baby". It was moving. I was so excited. She knows her daddy, still. Most times that I show her pictures of him, I don't get much of a response (probably due to a short attention span) but this time she was enthralled! I turned on the dvd (still in the dvd drive of the computer) of her daddy reading her "Oh the places you'll go!" She smiled and giggled and paid attention almost half way through the book. (quite an achievement!) It's these types of things that really make the day, and the sacrafices we make, totally worth it.
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